before...

wrapped in cotton batting

i was safe

for the first time

safe from the struggles of survival

and from the solitude I chose

and still choose

yet it was perfect

blessed with the ‘best of both worlds’

and I knew it, recognized it

the constant felt pain

of all the people and animals

was finally muffled

after...

in the world once more

all the cushion pulled away

thrown away, torn away

exposed

and the pain, the hypocrisy

me and everyone else

rushing in

without measure

without constraint

overwhelming my senses

and my sense of Self

finding myself tossed and drowning

sinking, sluggish, scattered

without a life vest

no boat in sight

this exposed world

of stark contrast and scarcity

no net to catch me---only airy promises

cry and cry

choking, quivering

weight of nothingness burying me

nothing is safe

because

everything changes

all I perceive

is illusion

nowhere is safety